History Lesson

Lately I've been a bitch to my husband. I haven't tried to be. But my emotions seem to always get the better of me. But what he doesn't know is I've been talking to God a lot lately. I think he knows that I talked to God when we were in Anchorage during my pregnancy. Back story: A long time ago I gave up on God. My life was hell. I was beaten physically and mentally. I was worn down and I was pregnant with my 1st child. My mother's boyfriend did not like me so I turned to the wrong person to get me out of my life. At 1st he was a caring loving man then when we found out we were having a boy he turned against me. He started calling me stupid, he started doing hard core drugs, and he started one of many affairs. After my son was born that's what he called him and that's how it has stayed up until now. We made an even bigger mistake we got married. Once that happened I lost all of my friends. I was only allowed to talk to one or two of my friends. As long as they didn't say anything bad about him. I was brain washed. We got pregnant with our daughter when he decided that he didn't want another child. So we went to the public health center asking about an abortion...luckily he changed his mind. I'm glad. Life got worse for me after his daughter was born. He started hitting me and sitting on me until I would pass out. I almost died a few times by his hand. He always bruised me where people could not see. My son being as smart as he is started refusing to leave me over night. My son has seen me get hit be sat on and choked to passing out. If I would have an asthma attack during this time he would tell me I was faking and hide my inhaler. Finally God and karma took care of my husband. Current story: I thought I would be alone forever when God intervened once again. I got a text that would change my life and my relationship with God. We have had a lot of trying times: He had a vacation that he didn't need His divorce lasted forever We had a miscarriage We had to commit our oldest son Unemployment for both of us at one time Fire charters that kept us apart Finally a pregnancy that stuck!! The only bad thing was I was working a high stress job. I only worked 3 days a week but some of those days I'd work between 8 to 16 hours. On April 13th I got admitted to the hospital. I prayed a lot that day and the days to follow. I know he did too. On the 14th of April I was shipped to a better hospital. The day I got there a friend of my father in law's came to see me and to pray with me. We asked God to help me keep my baby safe in my body for a few more weeks. After we did that I felt safer. I knew that it was in God's hands. Early the next morning my body started stressing and I started having contractions. I text my husband and told him what was going on. After we hung up I prayed that they would stop or if the wouldn't I prayed that I would not have the baby until my husband walked threw the door. Luckily the nurse was able to stop them. We had a few scares thanks to my blood pressure but my body held up until the 7th of May. 3 weeks after I had been sent to Anchorage. God granted us another prayer our daughter was healthy and did not need to be in the NICU. Now I have another prayer and I know that all of us is asking God for my husbands safe return from Alaska. I know we are also asking Him to make sure he comes home soon. I am learning while my husband is away more and more about God. I may not be going to church while he is gone but I do talk to his dad a lot and I think he knows but with talk to him I am starting to understand God a little more.