So Much

So much has been going on. My mind feels cluttered I really don't know what I am really feeling or thinking most of the time. I'm always tired, sore, and cranky. I am trying to be the best I can be for the family but sometimes I feel like I'm messing up more then doing good. I don't really have anything to do during the days expect take care of the baby, watch T.V., and play on Farmville 2. I have also discovered Lista which is an online auction site it has become a new addiction of mine. My love and our older kids have school. I am trying to also teach the baby stuff but it's been so long since I've had too teach anyone so little. I hope I'm not screwing her up like I did the other two. I took pictures today but no one seems to interested in looking at them. I got snapped at by one kid. One was too hyper and my love didn't seem to care cause he was watching a movie. Sometimes I feel like I'm just here. I wish my mind would let me think clearly but it doesn't seem to want too. I am not sleeping again at night cause I wake up with migraines when I do sleep. I can't stand them. I hope we can figure them out and soon. I go back to the doctor on the 23rd we may have to try a preventive medication again which they have never worked before. It really sucks. Maybe time will tell or maybe they will send me to St. Louis to see the migraine specialists which would be awesome. My main worry is they will find some form of brain damage due to all of the migraines.